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  • crazy_cures_0024_cc_sorrypills

    SORRY PILLS

    C$2.95

    WHENEVER YOU THINK ABOUT THE ROTTEN THING I DID, TAKE 2 SORRY PILLS. THEY’LL HELP YOU REMEMBER THAT I AM VERY, VERY SORRY.

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  • crazy_cures_0087_cc_lovepotion9

    LOVE POTION NO 9

    C$2.95
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  • crazy_cures_0044_cc_psychobitch

    PSYCHOBITCH

    C$2.95

    PSCHOBITCH BLACEBOS ARE AFFECTIVE ON PSYCHO BITCH MOTHERS, PSYCHO BITCH WIVES, PSYCHO BITCH GIRLFRIENDS,

    PSYCHO BITCH DRAG QUEENS AND PARANOID PSYCHO BITCHES. A PSYCHO BITCH HAS STRONG OPINIONS, IS ALWAYS RIGHT AND DOESN’T ARE WHAT YOU THINK. LEAVE THIS BOTTLE FOR HER AND RUN. SHOULD BE TAKEN WITH A FULL STOMACH OF VODKA OR GIN, LEAVE PREMISES WHEN IT STARTS TO WEAR OFF.

     

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  • crazy_cures_0120_cc_guiltex

    GUILTEX

    C$2.95

    GUIL TEX HELPS YOU GET RID OF ALL THOSE NAGGING GUILTY FEELINGS.

    DOSES ARE DETERMINED BY SOURCE OF GUILT.

    MOTHER……………..7 PILLS

    SPOUSE……………….5 PILLS

    CHILDEREN…………3 PILLS

    MOTHER IN LAW.. 12 PILLS

    BROTHER/SISTER..2 PILLS

    GRANDPARENTS…..4 PILLS

    BOSS……………………..8 PILLS

    BANK MANAGER…..10 PILLS

    UNCLE/AUNT………..1 PILL

    PETS………………………0 PILLS

    FRIENDS………………..6 PILLS

     

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  • crazy_cures_0017_cc_stressout

    ATRESSOUT

    C$2.95

    NOW YOU CAN CURE STRESS INSTANTLY WITH STRESSOUT

    JUST TAKE 2 TABLETS WITH 8OZ. OF SCOTH. IF SYMPTOMS PERSIST REPEAT EVERY 10 MINUTES UNTIL YOU DON’T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT ANYTHING!

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  • crazy_cures_0004_cc_wedjittersgroom

    GROOM

    C$2.95

    CALM THOSE PRE-NUPTIAL JITTERS AND ENJOY YOUR WEDDING!

    JUST BECAUSE YOUR ENTIRE LIFE IS ABOUT TO CHANGE DOESN’T MEAN YOU SHOULD BE NERVOUS,

    DON’T SWEAT THE OLD BALL AND CHAIN. BILLIONS OF PEOPLE HAVE SURVIVED MARRIAGE. REMEMBER THERE’S NOTHING TO FEAR BUT FEAR ITSELF.

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  • crazy_cures_0005_cc_wedjittersbride

    BRIDE

    C$2.95

    CALM THOSE PRE-NUPTIAL JITTERS AND ENJOY YOUR WEDDING! JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE BECOMING SOMEONE’S WIFE DOESN’T MEAN YOU SHOULD BE NERVOUS. DON’T WORRY-BILLIONS OF PEOPLE HAVE SURVIVED MARRIAGE AND LIVED TO TELL ABOUT IT! REMEMBER, THERE’S NOTHING TO FEAR BUT FEAR ITSELF.

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  • crazy_cures_0050_cc_phartaids

    PHART AIDS

    C$2.95

    FOR EXTREME CASES OF EAR-SHATTERING, NOSE-BREAKING FARTS, USE NEW 3X PHART AIDS. SPECIALLY FORMULATED FOR PEOPLE WHO CONTINUALLY PROPE! THEIR BUTT SULPHUR INTO THE ATMOSPHERE. IF YOU’RE AN INCONSIDERATE CLOD WHO KEEPS SPEWING BACK DOOR EXHAUST, IT’S TIME TO STOP CUTTING THE CHEESE WITH PHART AIDS.

    SIMPLY TAKE TWO PHART AIDS PLACEBOS AND STUFF ‘EM UP THAT MISBEHAVIN BUTT NOZZLE TO TRAP THOSE FART FUMES FOREVER!

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  • crazy_cures_0164_cc_blondie

    BLONDIE

    C$2.95

    ARE YOU TIRED OF BEING CALLED A DUMB BLONDIE? ( NOD HEAD IF YES.) NOW YOU CAN BE SMART AND BLONDE AND NO ONE WILL BE ABLE TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE!

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  • crazy_cures_0029_cc_shopperstoppers

    SHOPPER STOPPERS

    C$2.95

    HELP AT LAST FOR SHOPAHOLICS!

    SHOPPER STOPPERS CURES.

    • HEART STPPING CHARGE CARD STATEMENTS
    • CORNS ON THE FEET FROM TOO MANY HOURS IN THE MALL
    • EXHAUSTION FROM FIGHTING OVER FLASHING BLUE LIGHT SPECIALS
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  • crazy_cures_0178_cc_baditude

    BADITUDE

    C$2.95

    HERE’S HELP AT LAST FOR YOUR EXTREMELY BAD ATTITUDE!

    BADITUDE

    WORKS FAST TO RELIEVE:

    BIG EGOS

    SOUR FACIAL

    EXPRESSIONS

    EXCESSIVE COOLNESS

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  • crazy_cures_0037_cc_runawaygroom

    RUNAWAY GROOM

    C$2.95

    IS SHE TURNING INTO HER MOTHER BEFORE YOUR EYES?

    IS HER FATHER CALLING YOU SON AND STARTING TO TREAT YOU LIKE IT?

    ARE YOU HAPPY CRUSING ROUND THE TOWN AND NOT READY TO BE TIED DOWN?

    TIME FOR THE GREAT ESCAPE!

    JUST TAKE 2 RUNAWAY GROOM PLACEBOS AND THEN HOP ON A TRAIN, CATCH A BUS, FLAG DOWN A SHIP AND GET OUT OF TOWN.

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  • crazy_cures_0039_cc_retiremints

    RETIRE MINTS

    C$2.95

    TO MAKE YOUR RETIREMENT PLEASANT FOR  THOSE AROUND YOU TAKE RETIREMENTS THE MINT THAT’LL KEEP YOUR BREATH FRESH DURING THOSE LONG HOURS IN FRONT OF THE TELEVISION SET. ENJOY MINTY BREATH WHILE YOU FORGE AHEAD WITH MIND BOGGLING TASKS LIKE CHANGING CHANNELS,

    COMPLAINING ANEERING PASSING GAS….

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  • crazy_cures_0014_cc_superseventy

    SUPER SEVENTY

    C$2.95

    CONGRATULATIONS YOU HAVE REACHED THE BIG 7-OH!

    PEOPLE NOW LOVE YOU FOR ALL THAT YOU KNOW!

    THE KIDS HAVE FINALLY GROWN AND GONE AWAY

    YOU GET CHEQUES IN THE MAIL SO YOU CAN PLAY ALL DAY!

    VIAGRA ALLOWS YOU TO DO IT AGAIN & AGAIN

    YOU ARE SUPER SEVENTY AND LIFE’S FAR FROM MUNDANE!

    SO JUST TAKE 2 PLACEBOS TO KEEP YOU AWAKE AND

    GO MAN GO TILL 100 YOU MAKE……

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  • crazy_cures_0011_cc_trailerparktrash

    TRAILER PARK TRASH

    C$2.95

    TRAILER PARK TRASH CANDY PLACEBOS WORK FAST.

    THEY ARE SPECIALLY FORMULATED FOR PEOPLE WHO DO DRUGS. SLEEP AROUND WITH FAMILY MEMBERS AND WATCH JERRY SPRINGER ALL DAY LONG.

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  • crazy_cures_0021_cc_sportswidow

    SPORTS WIDOW

    C$2.95

    HAVE YOU HAD ENOUGH OF HIS ARMCHAIR QUARTERBACKING?

    LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE-HE’S SO WRAPPED UP IN THE BORING DETAILS OF SPECTATOR SPORTS THAT HE DOESN’T EVEN NOTICE IF YOU’RE THERE OR NOT! SMART WOMEN HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THIS!

    DIRECTION: MAKE HIM A NICE BIG SANDWICH AND GIVE HIM AN ICY BEER. THEN TAKE 2 OF THESE PLACEBOS, SLIP HIS CREDIT CARD OUT OF HIS WALLET WHILE HE’S CHEWING AND SIPPING AND GO SHOPPING!

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  • crazy_cures_0035_cc_seniormomints

    SENIOR MOMINTS

    C$2.95

    IF YOU HAVING A FEW TOO MANY SENIOR MOMINTS, YOU NEED SENIOR MOMINTS- THE SWEET LITTLE CANDY PLACEBO THAT WILL HELP YOU REMEMBER THE GOOD OLD DAYS WHEN YOU KNEW EXACTLY WHERE YOU PARKED YOUR CAR, WHY YOU COME INTO THE KITCHEN, WHAT THE NAME OF THAT MOVIE STAR WAS AND WHAT DAY IT IS.

    DIRECTIONS: HAVE A SENIOR MOMINT WHENEVER YOU FEEL LIKE IT-HELL- AFTER ALL THESE YEARS, YOU’VE EARNED IT!

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  • crazy_cures_0167_cc_birthdayblowout

    BIRTHDAY BLOW OUT

    C$2.95

    ARE YOU AT THE AGE WHERE THERE ARE MORE CANDLES ON THE CAKE THEN THERE IS AIR IN YOUR LUNGS?! NEED HELP BLOWING OUT ALL THSOSE CANDLES? BIRTHDAY BLOWOUT’S CAN ASSIST YOU IN GETTING A HEAD START ON YOUR BIRTHDAY BECAUSE THEY RESTORE THE BREATH IN YOUR LUNGS AND HELP YOU EXTNGUISH ALL THE CANDLES ASSOCIATED WITH OLD AGE!

    DIRECTIONS: TAKE A BREATH AND BLOW!

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  • crazy_cures_0020_cc_stayyoung

    STAY YOUNG

    C$2.95

    CONTROL YOUR AGE! GET RID OF UNWANTED YEARS AND RESTORE YOUTH!

    . SOFTEN WRINKLES

    .CONDITION SAGGING SKIN

    . ADD LUSTER TO CROWS FEET

    . SMOOTH PUFFY EYES

    . GROW HAIR

    . RESTORE FAILING MEMORY

    . INCREASE SEX DRIVE

    . TONE DOUBLE CHINS

    . FIRM UP POT BELLIES

    TAKE 2 STAY YOUNG AGE CONTROL PLACEBOS.

    TWICE EVERY DAY FOR 40 YEARS

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  • crazy_cures_0038_cc_runawaybride

    RUNAWAY BRIDE

    C$2.95

    FEELING THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD RESTING ON YOUR UNDER-FED,OVER-EXERCISED, SELF-TANNED SHOULDERS? PESKY FRIENDS AND RELATIVES CALLING WITH TIRING QUESTIONS ABOUT…DOES YOUR FATHER HAVE A RUNNING TALLY OF EVERY CENT HE WILL BE SPENDING ON THE ” HAPPIEST DAY OF HIS LIFE”

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